Innocent Speculation
by Fivercon
Summary: Ino wonders with a reluctant Shikamaru about their beloved teacher's social life. ShikaxIno. Oneshot.


A/N: It's about time! Whoo! This one-shot was my goal for Thanksgiving and it's my little something for Asuma.

Disclaimer: Naruto is owned by Masashi Kishimoto

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Innocent Speculation**

"Why do girls _always_ have to gossip?"

"Why do _you_ always have to complain? Listen, just because you're a chuunin doesn't mean that you're above my 'gossiping.'"

Shikamaru sighed all too obviously and stuck his hands in his pockets, determined to humor Ino once again through her latest people report.

"Besides," Ino turned and looked at her teammate. "This is _Asuma-sensei_ we're talking about. Aren't you happy that he's found someone?"

Shikamaru stared right back at the blonde with boredom clearly written in his dark eyes. "How do you even know this is true? Where's your evidence that Asuma has been seeing anyone? Been sneaking around have we?"

Ino crossed her arms indignantly. "I am so above that Shikamaru. A girl's got her resources. I don't snoop."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. If by resources you mean taunting Asuma constantly until he got flustered is by any way, a strategic move to conclude his supposed relationship." Shikamaru stated blatantly when he suddenly jumped as Ino whacked him on the arm for being such a smartass.

"Damn, you are so infuriating!" Ino snapped while Shikamaru yawned. Already this was shaping up to be another one of those times when Ino would talk herself into an incredibly long-winded conversation while Shikamaru would predictably stare off into space with an occasional nod here and there to keep her happy.

Or was it?

To be honest, Shikamaru was slightly curious to know what Ino had to say about their sensei. Even though the lazy thirteen-year-old acted like he didn't care about plenty of things (which usually isn't an act) he really had a spot in his heart for the ones that meant something to him. Asuma, his rather nonchalant jounin teacher who always played shougi with him and smoked cigarettes like a chimney, just happened to be one of those special few.

"Anyway, I guess I have to admit that you were right about the part where I _casually_ questioned Asuma-sensei about where he was going, what he was buying…"

"Uh-huh."

"But I wasn't able to get a lot out of him! He kept beating around the bush saying that the bouquet of roses wasn't for anyone in particular. He even denied it when I asked about Kurenai-sensei."

Shikamaru shook his head as he listened to her attempts of prying into Asuma's love life. "Ino, have you ever heard of the word _privacy_?"

"Look, Asuma-sensei is like family! Can I help it if I'm interested in his well-being?"

"Yes."

"So I've noticed several clues that led me to my suspicions and finally my conclusion," Ino continued as if she didn't hear Shikamaru at all. "First is, naturally, his stop at my family's flower shop to buy some _beautiful_ red roses, if I do say so myself. Seriously, after all the time I spent pruning and sweet talking those stubborn beauties to actually grow into…"

Ino suddenly stopped in her tracks and looked around. Apparently, the lazy genius had stopped walking about two minutes ago and had situated himself comfortably down on the grass.

_Not a lot of nice clouds out today. How disappointing._

Shikamaru closed his eyes, folded his arms under his head and continued to stay there knowing that only wispy gray cloud remnants passed slowly by overhead.

"Shikamaru!"

He winced as he opened one eye blearily to see his teammate make her way over to where he was, simply looking livid for his brief disappearing act.

_Wow, took her only two minutes to know that I'd stop following her this time. Ah, here come the fireworks…I wonder what's for dinner. Please let it not be the "Wonderful Surprise for my Loving Family" meal. After Ino wails on me, this badly beaten pulp is going to need a **good** meal for nourishment._

But instead of yelling at him, Ino simply walked over to his right side and sat down next to him. Because she had donned a rather complacent attitude, Shikamaru felt on guard and was forced to make an effort to get up on propped elbows lest she should really go supersonic on him.

You have got to hand it to the girl. She was as determined as they get. Relenting to the bossy girl, Shikamaru rolled his eyes and grunted in his 'Okay, just get on with it, I'll listen' tone.

Ino smiled knowingly and continued. "So after he bought the bouquet of roses, I noticed this strange smell."

"Oh, spare me."

"No, listen! It was this masculine, piney, brusque yet strangely refreshing scent…which could only mean one thing." She shot one finger up in the air to emphasize the importance of her discovery.

"Asuma is a tree chopping lumberjack?"

"NO! It means that he bought the new men's cologne that Jiraiya-sama just came out with!"

Shikamaru looked like he'd rather be doing remedial math problems than wondering why his sensei would use attractive men's cologne. Who knows why the man did anything anyway? Someone logical would think he would be using it to cover up the cigarette stink. After so many years of the smoking a pack a day regimen, there was sure to be a slightly musty smell.

Much to Shikamaru's exasperation, Ino was certainly not one of those people who looked at the logical standpoint of Asuma's desire to rid himself of the smelliness.

"Remember the commercial for the cologne?" Ino asked enthusiastically. "This really cute, sweaty guy is going back to his cabin in the woods after spending a long, hard day chopping wood-"

"See? Lumberjack."

"Shhh! Anyway, this is a magical forest with mystical creatures in it and as he walks through the trees, unicorns, sprites, and all the like emerge and get entranced by this guy. When he finally makes it back to his cabin, he opens the door and inside is a beautiful nymph or something and well…you can guess what happens next and no, Mr. Smarty Pants, they didn't show anything like that.

"But yeah, after the cabin door closes, a bottle of the Legends for men cologne pops up which is, according to my latest issue of Konoha Chic, the most popular cologne right now! Apparently, women are drawn to it like a moth to a flame."

Ino nodded, satisfied with her recount of such a cool commercial and her full-proof theory of why Asuma's involved with someone.

"And I am ninety-nine percent positive that it's Kurenai-sensei because they're always together!"

"Besides the whole…cologne evidence and them being together," Shikamaru droned on to prove that he listened. "What else can you possibly come up with to assume that they're an item?"

"Well, there's…" Ino immediately began but stopped in mid-sentence when she realized that she didn't have any other facts. "Don't you think that's enough? Besides, my intuition is _never_ wrong about these things!"

Now there was an interesting topic that caught Shikamaru's attention. He'll prod at it a little to see if he can ruffle Ino's oh-so-pretty feathers once just for fun.

"These things you refer to…what are you talking about? More nonsense to bore me with?"

"_Bore_ you with? As if! I happen to be very well informed with matters of the heart and my perception and keen eyes can always pick out a couple in love."

"Even when it concerns you?"

Ino's eyes held confusion for a fraction of a second before they darkened and the next moment found Shikamaru sporting a bump on his head after she knocked his right elbow off balance.

Shikamaru winced and placed a hand tenderly to his new head injury but didn't complain. After all, he knew he'd touched a sensitive subject but honestly hadn't meant to.

_That girl is just too much. I didn't mean anything about Sasuke…I was talking about…damn, this is just too troublesome._

"Hmph!" Ino turned her head sharply so that he couldn't see her face. This only caused the boy to inwardly curse about her temper tantrums and overreacting habits.

But then, Ino was merely playing the predictable role of an Uchiha Sasuke fan girl. After all, she'd gotten over that walking pile of angst ages ago. She had better things to do with her time than wondering what on earth went wrong with him and why this bundle of negativity was born with such a pretty face. Ino would let someone else take on that burden and save herself the trouble and the inevitable migraine that went along with it.

So why keep up the act? It was an image thing.

Even though practically everyone knew about her rivalry with Haruno Sakura over the village heartthrob, they often overlook the fact that their childish play was just a pretense for the serious underlying competition. They are kunoichi who depend on each other for growth and strength but to keep up with their reputations as girls fighting over their man, they maintain that façade to just keep things…edgy between them.

After all, who's ever heard of loving rivals? Especially between girls.

Suddenly, Ino turned around and stared at her childhood friend square in the eyes. "Well, what would you know about love, you lazy bum?"

Shikamaru smirked appreciatively and shrugged. He really _didn't_ know anything about love so he occasionally listens, albeit grudgingly, to the girl next to him talk about love in her life, other girls' lives, love in general and sometimes even love in Nara Shikamaru's mundane, cloud watching existence.

Naturally, the latter is, without a doubt, the worse for Shikamaru since every time that subject comes around, the teeniest, tiniest most innocent pink blush lights his cheeks and about one millisecond later, he announces that genin and later chuunin duty called.

Tired of just sitting on wet grass and looking at nothing but gray clouds alongside a boy with such a smart mouth, Ino cleared her throat and stood up but made no attempt to leave until Shikamaru moaned and groaned and got up too.

After they had walked for a good five minutes in companionable silence free from Ino's lovey-dovey updates and Shikamaru's cynicism on romance, they neared the neighborhood in which both their houses stood. As they passed a swing set, Shikamaru stifled a chuckle so that it came out a smirk but the effort was only rewarded with a rough push.

Shikamaru managed to regain balance before his posterior met with the ground. "What _now_?"

Ino merely scoffed and took an accusatory tone. "Don't act so innocent. Why is it that every single time we pass that stupid swing set, you always laugh! Won't you ever let me live that down?!"

With his bored attitude back in place, Shikamaru sighed, shook his head and continued sauntering down the old path.

"Hey!" Ino caught up with him and glared irritably at his apparent refusal of letting her embarrassing moment of many years before, go.

* * *

Eight years ago, little Shikamaru and Ino had been talking pretty much like how they are now but only with more kiddy topics like who got the best dessert for lunch that day. Their conversation lasted all the way into recess during which, all the children came out to play on the neighborhood jungle gym. Ino stopped her chatter for a brief moment much to Shikamaru's relief and secured one of the swings for herself. Not wanting to leave her buddy alone, she managed to reserve the one next to her as well. 

"Shika-kun! Come here! I got one for you!"

Poor little Shika-kun couldn't have looked more pitiful as he pouted and shook his head. Unfortunately, his feet betrayed his feelings and walked towards the girl with the big blue eyes that were about to well up with tears had he refused for another second.

"This is kinda, _really_ bothersome."

"Okay, let's see who can go the highest!" Ino suggested, completely oblivious to Shikamaru's droopy attitude and protests as she began pumping her tiny legs.

"Nah, I'll just sit here."

Ino looked questioningly over at the boy who sat on the still swing next to hers. He might as well have been a boring painting.

"You're just afraid that I'll beat you!" Ino stuck out her tongue teasingly hoping to get some competitive, fiery spirit burning inside of him.

Unfortunately, that flame she searched for was nonexistent in Shikamaru.

"I _know_ you'll beat me."

"You're lazy and a chicken and a little momma's boy!"

Well, so is my Dad but you don't see him going on any swings."

"Fine, I'm going to be flying in the air and you'll just be stuck on the ground."

Shikamaru simply sat there and watched her get higher and higher. So high in fact that he became a little bit worried about whether she could hang on.

"Um, I think you should stop." He called as she zipped passed him.

"Nuh-uh! This is so cool!" Ino yelled back as she went down and back up again. She laughed merrily as the wind played with her hair and ruffled the skirt of her lavender dress. After a few more moments of being airborne, she completely forgot her concerned friend on the ground.

"Fine. Whatever." Shikamaru shrugged sourly at her stubbornness but continued to stay exactly where he was.

Soon, a small crowd of children had gathered around the swing set to witness this amazing acrobatic kid fly high in the sky. Or at least something to that effect.

As Ino continued to gain more momentum, the swing neared a rather massive tree in the back. Now as a result of some absentminded architect, Ino's swing was about to hit one of its protruding branches in a couple of more rounds.

Fortunately, this did not escape Shikamaru's attention.

"Ino, stop!" He called frantically as he jumped off his seat and made a dash to grab her swing's chains in order to stop it.

Ino heard her name called and looked down in time to see her swing barely miss Shikamaru's pineapple-like ponytail.

"Watch out, Shikamaru! Geez! Don't worry! I'll help you get this high once I'm down there so just wait–"

Suddenly, she felt the swing stop and looked behind to see that one of the chains had indeed caught on a branch. The momentum jerked her swing back while causing her to slip forward. Ino felt her grip on the chains loosen and the next thing she knew, her fingers were no longer clutching at the cold metal but falling free through the air.

One second she was felt so high up near the blue sky and the next, she managed to catch a terrifying glimpse of the ground rushing up at her. There were gasps and screams for help all mixed into a brief moment until she closed her eyes and prepared for the impact.

The impact that never came.

Well, sort of. She did hit something but it sure wasn't the ground. When Ino managed to open her eyes, she found a familiar spiky ponytail block her vision.

"Shi-Shikamaru?" All familiar suffixes dropped as she saw his dirty, scratched up face scowl at her. The overwhelming feeling to cry made her eyes water as she realized he had attempted to catch her but ended up becoming a mat to break her fall instead.

It was then that she heard the laughing. The kids around them laughed uncontrollably and pointed to the two on the ground.

"Why are they laughing?" Ino asked, feeling her anger overpower the need to cry.

A slightly red Shikamaru only looked away and said, "Ino, your skirt."

* * *

"Hey! I happened to like those frilly, pink, pony-patterned panties, okay?!" Ino declared as she sped past the ancient swing set that held so many memories. 

Shikamaru was about to follow Ino around the corner when she stopped abruptly causing him to crash into her.

"What are you doing?" He groaned and peered over her shoulder.

"Shhh! Look it's Asuma-sensei and Kurenai-sensei!" Ino hissed as she pointed down the road where the two jounins were sitting at an open air café. They were talking and smiling and drinking coffee.

"So what? They could be having a meeting." Shikamaru argued as he made his way into the street.

"NO!" Ino grabbed him by the collar of his chuunin vest and yanked him back. "Look, I'm sure they've been seeing each other for quite a while now and the fact that _I_ just figured it out _now_ means that they want it to be a secret! If they see us, they'll act all business like and unnatural. We'll interrupt them!"

Shikamaru crossed his arms impatiently, "I repeat, so what?"

"Just give them some alone time you insensitive idiot! Asuma-sensei deserves that! They both do!"

Finally, Shikamaru sighed and looked over at the two and was surprised to see them share a brief kiss.

_Ino **was** right._

"Uh…"

Ino and Shikamaru both felt the heat rush to their faces as they found themselves unable to look away from their mentors. Asuma and Kurenai proceeded to touch hands and gaze into each other's eyes which only contributed more to the onlookers' catatonic state.

Suddenly, Shikamaru felt a tug on his arm.

"S-see? What did I tell you?" Ino stammered as she continued pulling him away from the romantic scene at the café.

"Fine. Come on."

Ino let go of his arm and they both turned to the right instead. Shikamaru walked a little more briskly than usual as he hurried away from his mentor while trying to figure out how girls could tune into this "matter of the heart" thing so accurately. Did Ino have this love radar programmed into her head?

"Ah, wasn't that sweet?" Ino giggled as she caught up with him. "He sure can be a gentleman when he wants to. Kurenai-sensei looked pretty happy back there, huh?"

Seeing the happy couple stirred some strange confidence in Shikamaru so he ventured to ask what he had planned to before he screwed up and got Ino all upset. "So if you're saying that you know all these things about Asuma and Kurenai…would you know it when some guy tries to court…you?"

"Of _course_ I would, Shikamaru! What kind of a question is that?" Ino huffed and started walking faster with her ponytail swishing behind her. Apparently, he'd screwed up again.

Shikamaru sighed.

_Right, Ino. You're not as perceptive as you think_.

Shikamaru closed his eyes in annoyance and continued to follow his longtime friend. But in doing so, he missed Ino looking behind her shoulder and smiling at him with a faint blush upon her cheeks.

"Hurry up, Shikamaru!"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm right behind you."


End file.
